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slcheang
Joined: 21 Oct 2006
Posts: 21
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 Posted: Fri Mar 23, 2007 6:40 pm Post subject: |
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| Jeff Minter wrote: |
I thought first generation were those who were born here? I'll agree with that though, often as a kid my parents took me to distance family restaurant gatherings - thought my eardrums would explode! They just wouldn't shut up :) Though western culture has it's equivalent in bars, it's a shout to get noticed ideal but in different settings.
Though not quite sure what you mean about helping the elderly and such being simple courtesy here (and no way in the States) - I've never seen anyone help another person from the kindness of their heart - with the exception of myself carrying stuff for a heavily pregnant woman back to her house. You're more likely to see the young take advantage of them, rob their money and beat them to the brink of death. It's all "me me me" everywhere in the world nowadays. |
From what I understand, first generation chinese in the UK means people who moved/immigrated into the country. If you were a chinese born here and your parents from mainland for eg, then you'll be a second generation chinese. Please feel free to correct me if I'm wrong.
Referring back to the simple courtesy issue, acts of kindness probably occur more in smally villages/towns where I'm used to. The point I was trying to make is by engaging more with locals, we encourage them to find out more about our culture. Let them have a chance to know us better. Back where I'm from, it's unusual to stop to greet a complete stranger let alone talk to one. I'm not sure if it is the same in HK/mainland. But this is quite common in my area of the UK. I'm still learning the art of conversation and it's sometimes nice to chat to people you've just met. Once they know you can speak their language well, they'll warm towards you. Again this is the personal opinion of a "talkative" GP. |
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ex-VAG
Joined: 13 Dec 2006
Posts: 445
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| Posted: Mon Mar 26, 2007 5:43 pm Post subject: |
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Like Jeff, I understood first generation as the first born in this country of immigrant parents. Your folks come over, you're born here making your first generation, your children 2nd generation.
Don't think I've experienced racism in my latter years, was really bad when I started my Saturday job at Sainsburys at 16, but then again it was only one bloke, one of the trainee managers working in my dept! Everyone else was fine |
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Chineseperson
Joined: 19 Sep 2006
Posts: 19
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| Posted: Tue Mar 27, 2007 6:41 pm Post subject: |
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| slcheang wrote: | Hi chineseperson. Hope you don't mind me asking about your original post. Do you feel uncomfortable with yourself in public? Has self esteem/confidence ever been an issue you're concerned about? There is a good website for Cognitive Behaviour Therapy I regularly recommend to my patients. Let me know if you're interested as it has good evidence in improving these matters.
No conflicts of interest to declare
David |
Well sometimes I wonder too whether or not it is due to something more personal rather than racism.
But it's still perplexing. I mean I certainly don't look very good, but I don't look very bad either, my self-esteem is neither high nor low. I'm just an ordinary person, literally.
Besides, most of these people don't even know me at all. I cannot understand what motivates them in the first place, even if I do look really bad, and I don't. Suppose I come across a person who looks really "bad", I won't even be bothered to waste the energy to look at him... |
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Makara
Joined: 09 Apr 2007
Posts: 2
Location: Walsall
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| Posted: Mon Apr 09, 2007 2:12 am Post subject: Oops |
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Okay, chipping in on this from the other side so to speak (6'2" shaven headed white guy here). All told, I could look like a bit of a thug and am probably guilty of giving funny looks.
But...
Bouncing up to random asian people and asking if they're a weiqi player feels like as bad a bit of stereotyping as asking about opium dens would have been 100 years back. But surely there must be some players among Brum's chinese community, so I find myself trying to work out if someone might be a player. Net result: funny looks from a skinhead...oops
Anyway, my point is that (although they're unlikely to be a go player) an odd look from a white person could be similarly innocent. Due to race, but not racist, and certainly not negative, if that makes sense. |
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Jeff Minter
Joined: 31 Aug 2006
Posts: 342
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| Posted: Mon Apr 09, 2007 10:05 am Post subject: |
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But that's the problem. You're assuming (and we all know what that leads to) a stereotype of a person based on their race. While not racist, it's in the same ball park - racism, discrimination, stereotyping, prejudice - it's all linked.
Yeah, we all stereotype - whenever I see a priest I automatically assume he must be a spare time paedo or homo - and all Irish folk are drunkards (to be fair, so far from all those I've met this has rung true), but when it applies to a single race, furthermore one that equates to 1.3 billion people, it's unforgivable. |
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Makara
Joined: 09 Apr 2007
Posts: 2
Location: Walsall
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| Posted: Mon Apr 09, 2007 12:05 pm Post subject: |
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Jeff, you're absolutely right. Assuming all chinese people anything is extremely foolish - we are all individuals & all that. However, assuming that there's a greater awareness amongst the asian community of a pastime that originated in china doesn't feel any more unreasonable that people asssuming I support a football team based on how I look. Please correct me if I'm wrong in this - it's why I piped up in the first place.
My hunch was kind of backed up by an experiment yesterday replaying pro games in a bar in the chinese quarter of Brum. Definitely got a few knowing glances at the board and comments of "weiqi" - more than I could have expected anywhere else.
Definitely going to have to check myself from the looking & wondering thing though, Whilst I may know it's innocent, from the other person's perspective it must be intimidating / threatning / just plain upleasant. Sincere apologies to anyone who has been the unwilling victim of my doing this. |
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azn4chinkyf
Joined: 06 May 2007
Posts: 4
Location: London
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| Posted: Sun May 06, 2007 11:34 am Post subject: |
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Ello everyone im new ere and nt Chinese bt love the Chinese culture and the people. I have to say the Chinese are thee most non racist people ive come across . My mates bro got married to a Chinese girl and even though his fam where not 100% happy about it at first the manners and the sweetness of the girl and her fam have totally won their hearts..
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There is a wonderfull mythical law of nature that the 3 things we crave most in life -- happiness, freedom & peace of mind -- are always attained by giving them to someone else... |
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bhyt
Joined: 10 Jun 2007
Posts: 173
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| Posted: Sun Jun 17, 2007 2:02 pm Post subject: |
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yeah i was on a bus in central london one time, when the driver asked me 'do you speak english?' and which point i said yes (in fact i wanted to tell him i was only doing a bloody degree in english), and it was the first time someone has ever asked me if i spoke english or not. i couldn't help but feel offended.
don't really get stares in london though, cos it's such a mixed place.
but the question really is-when u see other chinese people do you stare at them?! cos sometimes when i see other chinese ppl near where i live-i can't help but stare cos i start wondering why they look so familiar, or if they're a family friend lol or if they went to the same chinese school. also when i'm out with non chinese friends, i tend to get looks from older chinese ppl. |
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pensggs
Joined: 24 Jan 2007
Posts: 372
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| Posted: Mon Jun 18, 2007 9:36 am Post subject: |
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To 'bhyt'. Ever look inwards! Why are you offended?
Maybe sometimes, being 'Chinese' or 'Different' makes us defensive.
I get comments like 'Oh, your English is very good' from strangers or from 'first time acquaintances' but not from 'friends' and people that bothers to get to know me.
Try the 'Tai Chi of Life', it is sometimes more productive to absorb the 'hits' and return to 'floored' these people with the 'strength of your knowledge/skill'. |
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